That made me laugh - but compared to dogs, your cats are angels.
Of my sisters's 3 dogs, the male (fixed, but still) is the biggest most rambunctious baby. He is very athletic and runs fast all over the yard and the paddocks, jumping over brush and logs in the woods, and chasing the youngest dog, who chases him back - they get very wild and have lots of fun.
But then, back inside the house he wants to jump up on the couch, *sit in your lap*, and lick your entire face with great enthusiasm.
He weighs about 50 pounds - about 23 kilos and stands about 2 feet tall at the shoulder, so he is not the right size for a lapdog. And I really like some distance with my face, where animals or humans are concerned. :D.
Smokey does not try to do that, she just sits beside me and purrs.
Here he is, front and center. Ignore him at your own peril.
Further back you can see her oldest dog running toward the action.
Looks like 50 pounds of a very loving (to the point of obnoxiousness) dog
I had a whippet. She could jump so high that she could lick my face in the air. That was after she made several circles of a high-speed greyhound race around the house.
In the meantime I've become THE cat queen. During the last day of pet sitting her, the neighbours' cat licked my legs, feet, and even the floor where I stepped. She also tore apart one toy during playing and showed several other symptoms of madness displayed by my own cats. I must have brought the virus on my shoes... My cats got depressed. They stared in the window quietly every time I left for pet sitting. When I came back they clung to me hysterically (at night I had to give up finishing some work, because they literally pinned me to bed with their claws). They are oriental shorthair (Siamese derivatives) known for being very social. They don't just sit next to me purring, they clutch to my body like baby monkeys, rub their heads against my face and make sounds which resemble more pidgeon's cooing. I've juts had a paw stack in my eye, because I stopped kissing one of them...