Tortoise: Let me tell you, instead. That will save some time. In the first place, Record Player Omega incorporated a television camera whose purpose it was to scan any record before playing it. This camera was hooked up to a small built-in computer, which would determine exactly the nature of the sounds, by looking at the groove- patterns.
Achilles: Yes, so far so good. But what could Record Player Omega do with this information?
Tortoise: By elaborate calculations, its little computer figured out what effects the sounds would have upon its phonograph. If it deduced that the sounds were such that they would cause the machine in its present configuration to break, then it did something very clever. Old Omega contained a device which could disassemble large parts of its phonograph subunit, and rebuild them in new ways, so that it could, in effect, change its own structure. If the sounds were "dangerous", a new configuration was chosen, one to which the sounds would pose no threat, and this new configuration would then be built by the rebuilding subunit, under direction of the little computer. Only after this rebuilding operation would Record Player Omega attempt to play the record.
Achilles: Aha! That must have spelled the end of your tricks. I bet you were a little disappointed.
Tortoise: Curious that you should think so ... I don't suppose that you know Godel's Incompleteness Theorem backwards and forwards, do you?