February 26th, 2004, 11:47 am
Allright my man RFMontraz... music please. I once new a geezer named Bell, first name Mike,his mother was ugly, like a goat she did look like,240 pounds, body hair, not tits and she was a dyke,Upon his birth, the nurses went on strike:Telling the doctors, "Doc, you've got to kill it, it's a freak"The doctors said: "Why you are right, it's even got a beak","And what's this? It opens it, but it looks like it can't speak?"Onyl drool comes out, looks like there must be a leak."The doctors wanted to put him down for good,they explained to his mother he would be a waste of food,A nurse said that his flesh looked tough, but perhaps if you stewed..."Yes." said the doctor. "Good idea... A goat steak, who else is in the mood?"Shrieking his momma took Mike and he rode out on her as if she was a donkey,A fine picture they made... a fat goat and a deformed boy, who looked like a monkey,As they got home, he met his father, who was heroin junkie.He took one look at him and said: "Wife... your son looks quite funky.""Son, you're the ugliest think I've ever seen.look at you, your fur is all green,What are you, bearer of some mutant gene?Hell, I suppose we can only let you out on Halloween.So he spent his youth away in the woods in a little shack,His parent's only gave him water and bark, for a snack.They made him work in a salt mine until they broke his back,Then they fixed his spine again by strechting him on a rack.At eighteen they took him and had him wrapped,sent him as a package to uni so he would learn to adapt,He ended up in Boston, he had no money, he was trapped.Harvard hat to take him because he was handicapped.To get rid of him they gave him some money and a degree to boot,They threw him out the gates and told him if he returns, they will shoot.So there he was, a moron with a diploma and an ugly suit."Now what?" he wondered and stood there as if taken root.Eventually and old lady found him and took him to the vet,thought he was a stray dog and wanted to make him her pet.The doctor looked at him and smiled and simply said:"Sorry, ma'am this thing has rabies, I'm afraid he's almost dead."So without further ado he took poor little Mike Bell,Skinned him alive because the green fur he could sell,The rest he trew in the trash because of the smell,That's the end, really, may he rest in hell.